Decade.

11.29.2003

It feels like yesterday that Shannon and I were planning our wedding, prepping for marriage, but it's really been 10 years. A decade. We had been dating 5 years prior to that date. We have been together for 15 years. There is a lot of history between us. A lot of good times, speckled with the trying times of life. But I can't imagine my life without this man.

I wish I had the words to be able to write a book about how thankful and blessed I feel today. But, I can't. I am .... so blessed. 

Shannon -- Love you, babe. Thank you for what you do for me and our family. I can't imagine my life without you. I look forward to what to today and what lies ahead for us. With you by my side, I am successful, happy and challenged to be better. You try to complete my sentences, but you know what I like on my sandwiches and what pizza toppings I like. You really are the peanut butter to my jelly. Love you. 

 

Post move update....

So, it's not much of a secret -- we have moved. Somehow we managed to (eventually) gather almost 10 years of memories into the largest truck possible, my Tahoe, pick up(s), and a trailer. It was ridiculous and so overwhelming to me/us. We went through a great time of purging before the move, and are still in that phase post move. There's a good chance the borough isn't fond of our trash loads. But, this too shall pass.

Our new home!

Here is how we are doing, roughly three weeks at our new place:
Shannon - awesome. He has gotten back to cooking normal meals instead of hamburger helper (insert gag face). He has quite a few outdoor (and indoor) projects to work on since the house has been vacant for almost a year. He's enjoying more family time, and less time on the road. We are loving the extra time with him. Plus, with Audrey riding the bus he's able to take her to the bus stop in the mornings if needed.

Audrey - fantastic. She has had to do so much adjusting. New room. New school. New teacher. New friends. Riding the bus for the first time. But, I think she is doing well. I asked her the other day if she was happy .. her reply was a solid YES. She, of course, misses her friends from her old school and street. We just need to make efforts to make plans and play dates.

Landon - That boy. We were preparing ourselves for many restless nights, but he's been a rock star. He's starting to try to form some independence, and it's a challenge. He's done well at going with the flow and we have tried to keep things as much the same as possible. Unfortunately, he has started to have an intolerance to dairy and car rides (insert masked emoji face). I am done with vomit in my car, his car seat, and on him. His car seat is going to get the boot once he has had a settled belly for a couple months. I really hope this goes away around the time of his second birthday...

And, last, as always, is me. I feel such a huge relief that this is done. When we signed at settlement I knew it was time to unload trucks, but it was all going to be okay. We have time to make this place our home. I have been ridiculously stressed out.. I think to the point I may have gone numb and didn't really feel anything. I am very on with my general appointments - eye doctor, dentist, hair, etc.. I haven't had my hair done in a good 6 months. The ONLY appointment I kept and made was for my eye specialist. And I told them to feel special because this was the ONLY appointment I was planning on making. This past week was the first we were able to get back to taking care of myself, my animals, my family, etc. I had taken a week from the cafe (and the good coffee) to take care of my family. So glad that I am at a place where I can do that and it's okay. I was able to get so much DONE. What a relief. We had no idea where to put a lot of our boxes so the ended up in the garage. By the time I went back to work we were able to actually use the garage for a car.

It's been a journey, but the journey of 'moving' is over. We are in the beginning of writing the next chapter about being able to live, love and find a new sense of normal. It feels like home now. We are all doing well, we are happy, healthy, and adjusting. It's also a great feeling to know we can start saying YES to invites now without feeling guilty.

Photos will come of the house. It's still a work in progress with a few boxes remaining. But a LOT less than we had 2 weeks ago :)

Thank you for following me/us on this journey!

Kindergarten.. already? How!?

Wow. I can't believe I have dropped my 9 pound bundle of joy off to Kindergarten. Oh wait.... she isn't my 'baby' .... she's growing up and she is becoming someone I am so proud to be able to call my daughter. She is excited.. she's excited for her music days, but when the time came for me to NOT walk her to her room, she was nervous, and unsure. Inside, I was too. But with a gentle, "Momma loves you" she was off.. and with a wave of her hand she is enjoying the next adventure in her life. I am so excited to see what she learns and I can't wait to hear all about her first day of school.

Our "Kissing Hands"

Pick up was perfect. I wasn't late, she was so happy to see us, and she was ready to go play with our neighbor. She had no interest in telling me about her day. So far, she loves kindergarten. I'm so excited to see what this year does for her. She's going to do fantastic.

So proud

Hugs!

And she's off... and I had tears rolling down my cheeks

She turned and waved! I cried. Love her.

(Audrey -- someday when you read this, remember, no matter how big you are, how smart you are, how many friends you have, remember - I love you. You are an amazing person. Whatever you set your mind to, you will accomplish. I love you to the moonlights. Always, your Momma)

Breathe in ... breathe out...

House update

(Originally written July 14)

Wow. I am in awe. Tears are in my eyes as I am writing. We have been given an offer, and accepted an offer. We are under contract. I am so thankful. Here is how God works in His timing and so not mine.

Closing date is set for September 27. Granted, that's not BEFORE school starts, however, we also don't have to rush out this week and find a place to put a contract. We have some time to find a place. I will have to drive her to/from school and work out some details, but she can start in Shippensburg. Man. That's going to be some early mornings! But it will be worth it not to pull her out a month after school starts.

The nice thing about us not closing in 30 days is we have more than a week to find a place. We have time, not a lot, but we do have some wiggle room. Not a lot of wiggle room, but we do have the pro of some time.

We have been immersed in praying big prayer at church. What perfect timing! To pray the bigger prayers, pray off the record, pray for the things that scare us. Yup. Perfect to be thinking about selling our home, finding a new place, and creating a small season of change for our family. The last month we have done a lot of big praying. Scary praying. But we have also put action behind our prayers (painting, open house, change in price, etc).

We are thankful. We are at peace with this change.

Now, onto some funny things about this process. It has been stressful, and it has been chaotic, but there are always moments of funny to relieve some of the tension.

This past week we painted, lowered our price, took updated photos, and set up an open house date. With the photos I hid as much as I possibly could. Like, putting dirty dishes in the oven ..... and then forgetting about the plastic dishes until the oven was preheated to 400 degrees. Oops. Well, Landon got a new cup out of the deal! Speaking of hiding things --- it's amazing how much stuff a person can hide in the washer, dryer, oven, closets, under the bed, under the couches... Or forget about said items. Like dirty clothes by the shower as a family is walking into the house for a showing. Yes, that really happened. We had a showing July 13, and the family wanted a second showing July 14, same day as our open house. I cleaned like a mad woman, left the house.... and then realized I had left dirty clothes in the bathroom. Blah. Came running back to hide said clothing in the washing machine. Who cares -- THAT family made the offer! :)

This road has been a road that I wasn't sure would ever come to an end. It has been a journey and we are at the beginning of the next phase of our journey. Thank you for everyone who has followed us to the beginning of the journey! Stay tuned for the next steps. :)

Father's Day

There are some holidays that are bittersweet for a variety of reasons. Mother's and Father's Day are days I should just stuff tissues in my bra and enjoy the day making new memories while revisiting my history and remembering.

We have had some disappointments with the process of moving. We are ready to get an offer, make an offer, box up our stuff, put it in a truck, unload our boxes, unpack them and make new memories. We are just ready. However, it's not happening as we thought that it would. So we wait.

Let me first say this - I love my church - Lifehouse. I/we have found the messages to be what we needed exactly when we needed them. As well as some comic relief -- Harlem Shake - CHECK IT OUT! I'm pretty sure we just watched that video about 20 times.. So, yes, hilarious, but also applicable.. Big idea I grabbed from today - Live a legacy. Not leave a legacy.

I know the basics of a Nobel Peace Prize, but had no idea how the prize came into existence. Turns out the gentleman, Alfred Nobel, read what was supposed to be his brother's obituary but it was actually HIS. From Wikipedia ---

In 1888 Alfred's brother Ludvig died while visiting Cannes and a French newspaper erroneously published Alfred's obituary.^[1] It condemned him for his invention of dynamite and is said to have brought about his decision to leave a better legacy after his death.^[1][7] The obituary stated, Le marchand de la mort est mort ("The merchant of death is dead")^[1] and went on to say, "Dr. Alfred Nobel, who became rich by finding ways to kill more people faster than ever before, died yesterday."^[8] Alfred was disappointed with what he read and concerned with how he would be remembered.

Can you imagine reading what was supposed to be a siblings obituary but it was actually your OWN?! Needless to say, Nobel changed his will and developed what we now know as the Nobel Peace Prize. I found that amazing. He was able to completely change and created a new legacy that day.

Also, there is a huge difference between God's will and doing what God has asked of me versus me taking God's will and doing things MY way. 

Joshua 5:13-15

¹³ Now when Joshua was near Jericho, he looked up and saw a man standing in front of him with a drawn sword in his hand. Joshua went up to him and asked, “Are you for us or for our enemies?”

¹⁴ “Neither,” he replied, “but as commander of the army of the Lord I have now come.” Then Joshua fell facedown to the ground in reverence, and asked him, “What message does my Lord^[e] have for his servant?”

¹⁵ The commander of the Lord’s army replied, “Take off your sandals, for the place where you are standing is holy.” And Joshua did so.

Trust. Faith. Believe. All words, emotions, and feelings that I have lost in our process of moving. I haven't been trusting. I haven't had faith that it's going to happen. And quite frankly, I haven't been on the believing side of things either. I have felt very alone in my prayers. I have felt like I was talking to myself versus talking to God. Today, that changed. In a quiet moment, Shannon and I both felt a small voice quietly, but with a loving firmness say --- Trust. Trust Me. I know what is best for you and your family. But you need to trust Me. Crap that's hard. Hard to trust. Hard to continue to follow what you believe in your heart is right, but then just wait. And wait. We have felt and have seen so many YES answers to us relocating that we, okay, I, am confused, frustrated and discouraged that we are still sitting. 

On another side of trust and listing to my Heavenly Father it also makes me think of earthly fathers. I miss my dad. There is no doubt about it. He passed away over 12 years ago, and today it feels like we just laid him in the ground yesterday. There is a lot I wish he could have seen before he passed -- my college graduation, my wedding and be able to walk me down the aisle, meeting his great grandchildren... helping me plant a small garden.. helping out around the house.. spending time with the family.. just loving life. I know he may have been able to see those things, but now I wish I could have been able to experience those life moments with him. I am so thankful for those of my friends who are able to change their facebook profile photos to their wedding day with their daddy. I am so sad I can't do that. He passed away shortly after my 19th birthday. Today I wish I had more time for more memories with him. I know there is a lot I have forgotten.. 

I remember him trying to sing "3 French Hens" at a Christmas party and my mom crawling under the table.. I remember days of him working in the garden, providing for his family.. I remember that when he spoke, people listened.. I remember the way he smelled and his aftershave.. I remember he always wore pants, no shirt, a hat, had his water jug and a smile on his face.. I remember his sweet spirit.. I remember that he loved his family and the Lord.. I remember him. And today as I am remembering him, I am hoping to also make memories with my little family. I am praying that what he taught, I will also be able to teach my kiddos.

May box!

I'll be honest, we have had so much stuff going on between Open House, cleaning, working, preschool, T-Ball, etc., etc., etc., that I had the pleasant surprise of just finding my box one day instead of stalking the tracking for it. So, while Landon is half asleep (boo to preschool jacking with any morning naps. Granted, the boy is also almost 17 months old and probably getting ready to transition into one nap versus two. Ugh.)

PEN!!! I'm a sucker for a great pen. I like pens that have a bold look to them, but also smooth. The fine tip Sharpie markers are some of my favorite --- but they can smear. This one doesn't. I do wish it was blue or black (I'm not a huge fan of various shades of ink. Messes with my eyes.) but the slight tinge of purple is a welcome change for me. Plus, it came with a coupon -- win-win!

Blush - Cargo -- it states it's waterproof... I don't live at the beach, or have a pool, but I do sweat. Oh, and cry. I've been emotional lately. It's almost like there is a little too much on my plate. Shocker. Oops. Sorry. Blush. I like the color! It's so nice for my skin tone! Just adds a slight pop of color and a little bit of shimmer. Totally recommend!

Toothpaste. Odd addition, but this also came the day after I bought a tube. Can you say a day late and a dollar short!? Oh well. It's minty and great, but I'm cheap. I'm not paying $10 for toothpaste unless it whitens, brightens, and tons my abs.

Hair Product! Miss Jessie's Jelly Soft Curls is a great product. It's light, but also seems to give some hold to my hair. I like when my hair has some gentle wave to it! The sample was HUGE too (twss) so I've been able to try it out for over a week. Huge plus! 

Moisturizer. Well, I had a blonde moment! I thought this was straight sunscreen and I don't do well in the sun. I burn. No, I usually turn fiery red and am miserable for days. Oh the sunburns... *shivers* So, I'm going to try this out today! Ha. Sounds like it has some great benefits to it .. cucumber, soothe and tone skin, and SPF 30. Granted, if you live in my neck of the woods it feels like winter has returned in May. Hello, Memorial Day? I'll bring my parka! 


While I have you -----

We are still sitting and waiting for an offer on our house. It's been frustrating having two open houses and NOTHING materializing from either. We have so much drive by traffic, but the showings are so sporadic it's disheartening. It will happen. Preschool just ended, T-Ball has another two weeks but then I'm ready to be moving ahead. But if you or someone you know is considering a move to PA, think of our home. Email me for details.

Have a great day folks and Happy Memorial Day to you and yours!